A group-sex guide for couples in Romania

I started my sex life at an appropriate age. I don’t have childhood traumas and my parents are fine and happily married. At that time sex didn’t seem to be a big deal, until I met the father of my children, the person who opened new sexual horizons for me and was a true guide in discovering my own desires – cause each of us has certain fantasies when it comes to sex. His philosophy was “you’re young, you have to learn as much as possible”. And that’s what I did.

Destiny wanted me to meet him at a young age, when I was 18 years old. Thus I discovered early what I liked. Sex! I’m not a nymphomaniac, but I’d have sex at any time. And the fact that I liked women was but a sure way to group sex.

In my experience, most women in Romania, are not, unfortunately, open to group sex. Most of the time, I think, they don’t want to be “the third wheel” or, even sadder, they use sex only as a bait to build-up stable relationships. For a few years we were the sporadic clients of some erotic massage salons or we have been just searching for escorts. Sometimes we were lucky and found a phenomenal bisexual babe, ready to do anything.

Most of the times we bumped into into girls that were doing this for a few extra bucks, a goal frequently engrained in their attitude, other times we bumped into “principled whores”, which simply had missed their vocation in life. And we were always perceived as some sexual deviant freaks.

Anyway, group sex isn’t at all like in the movies or books. Obviously there were awkward, comic and fantastic moments, but also horrific ones or some others that gave me nightmares for months.

The first experience

Every human being on this earth will remember the first experience. Regardless of circumstances and whether or not it was good or bad. My first time happened at an erotic massage salon.

I stepped inside slightly embarrassed, I let my boyfriend talk, chose. Guide me. The girl was beautiful, she had a well taken care body and she let herself go with the flow, impressed by my young age. A common feature of the couples attending the massage salons is their elderly age, so as a young woman or a young couple you are going to surprise many girls. Possibly you will get favours more easy. Of course, it can be said I had beginner’s luck.

The best experience

At one of the best rated erotic massage salons in Bucharest there was Rebecca, a Romani girl. This, the fact that she had the body of a goddess, and that her beauty beat those described in Eliade’s stories led to the best sex I ever had with a woman. You could tell she was at least bisexual, if not downright leaning to lesbianism. She was skinny, feline, dark complexion, velvet skin, small breasts, shiny green eyes, curly hair and a gorgeous face. She did everything passionately and unsparingly.

She instinctively agreed to whatever we suggested, without any hesitation, with joy. That evening I received the first cunnilingus from a woman. She abandoned herself fully to pleasure and so did we, and when all three have finished, we hold each other’s hand. I know, it may sound childish, but it was wonderful. tantra 2photo credits

When such a girl works in a place where you can schedule whenever you want, on the spot you have the impression that you can repeat the experience anytime. But it seems the destiny is not built to give you ceaselessly such treasures. The second time we wanted to visit her they told us she had left the country. We think about her even now and feel a thrill of pleasure and melancholic desire in our bodies.

The nightmare that followed me for months

After you have threesome sex for a while, an orgy seems just the normal further step in the evolution of group sex. I learned that things are not exactly so. Apart from organising work, orgies imply having sex or at least seeing people not necessarily chosen by you. And, sad to say, no matter how drunk or high you are, sometimes you can’t get over this.

For that particular orgy we flew all the way to Istanbul where an elder austrian friend, somewhat burned-out from too much cocaine, organized it. It was us, a prostitute and an acquaintance of the foreigner who came from Ukraine for the occasion. He paid for the cocaine, the prostitute and the acquaintance’s flight from Ukraine, we paid the apartment, the hotel rooms and our own flight.

The austrian guy’s idea about successful group sex was completely different from ours and had nothing romantic about it. The prostitute, with whom the austrian guy met before and who knew his urges, came tooled up with a rubber glove in order to penetrate with her hand deep inside the austrian guy’s ass. The whole orgy was put immensely behind schedule because the two went out in the city to search a strap on. When they returned, they brought one with an attached vibrator which probably exceeded by far the size of my leg.

Not even the two grams of coke I snorted alone didn’t allow me to touch the guy, who had became completely lewd and was licking my toes like a dog. I had a kind of sex with the prostitute, then I watched as all of them inserted fingers and hands in the vagina of the Ukrainian acquaintance. Then I left the room and all night long I commuted between the bed and the bathroom, cause I couldn’t get the hideous images out of my head and, ironically, the coke had begun to bounce me into reality.

The most embarrassing experience

Let’s get back to Romania and to the famous erotic massage salons. The salons are the most handy places to have sex. From the first jump, all have inserted in the menu the massage for couples.

Dependent on the massage girl’s degree of openness and on the chemistry developed, you can have various surprises. One day we went to a salon in the very centre, one that my partner knew. “They perform things beyond the typical erotic massage”, he told me on a promising tone on our way there. Haplessly he was there so long ago he did not know the staff anymore: we were met in the vestibule by two flaccid dames, with their half hair dyed, close to their fifties. They were wearing lingerie… “to create ambience”, I thought naively. After some de rigueur introductions and greetings, I expected that they would bring the girls for the presentation parade. Instead they told us that we can pick any of the two.

Let’s make it clear: they looked like that cousin’s aunt who lives in a suburb, a bit cuckoo and with lots of cats. While my boyfriend, baffled, was racking his brains to see if he could detect any sexual fantasy with the cuckoo aunties to save the day, I let him know, nudging him with sharp elbows, that in that very moment we had something urgent to do elsewhere, something that brooked no delay. They were kind and apologized, and even told us that on Tuesdays and Thursdays there were younger girls (probably their granddaughters) which would have gladly received us.

We never returned there and, in fact, for quite some while we haven’t crossed the threshold of any salon, no matter if massage, hair or pedicure salon.

sex in grup copyright flickrhivemind.netphoto credits: flickrhivemind.net

Sex with couples from the internet

There is no such thing in Romania. The couples offering this kind of experiences are formed generally by a babe close to her forties, 3-4 plastic surgeries on her credit, together with her partner who poses with his worked-out biceps, an erect tool of which is uniquely proud, penetrated by his own virility (allegorically and likely literally by those with a better mobility), the key of his BMW on a finger and some Armani sunglasses on his moron chav-like mug. Don’t do this in Romania. Try it elsewhere in the world…

Sex with a friend

Contrary to what is believed in group sex folklore, having sex with a friend will not send the friendship to hell, we won’t look oddly at each other the day after and we won’t feel embarrassed.

Sex with a woman friend was one of the best sexual intercourse ever. We skipped the uneasiness of knowing each other and I allowed myself to do more things than with a stranger. In fact she went up in my estimation and now, when we meet in wider acquaintance circles, a secret intimacy binds us together. Sex was delightful because my friend has a huge libido, and each of us availed herself of the opportunity to satisfy at leisure every fantasy she had.

Before finishing, we took unbelievably dirty and arousing photos which we will never be able to show to anybody, even though many would pay through the nose to see them.

Sex in another corner of the world

We went to Thailand on holiday. At the seaside, on an exotic island. Inevitably, after 3 days of marvelling at the sea, nature, services, food and all the beauty around, the Evil one instilled in our souls the thought… to take a girl. The girls offering love for money were gorgeous and everywhere.

As we befriended genuinely everybody in the hotel, the female receptionist, the valet, the girl selling tours and all the rest of the staff, we’ve been thinking about the best strategy to sneak a whore in our room. We were burning with shame, imagining they will never speak to us again. Until we saw a discreet, but central and visible notice at the reception desk – like at every hotel reception desk, as a matter of fact – saying that the hotel was imposing a fee of about 2,5 dollars for any extra guest brought in the room. We realized then what the notice was about and that inviting a prostitute in the room was something tolerated.

photo credits

That night we summoned our strength and hired a beautiful girl which at the beginning stammered at my boyfriend something like “you already have a girlfriend” and then “I come with you but I lick no pussy, can I still come?”, but when it came to make love she licked me till she drove me crazy with a thirst which did not contain itself, nor cease.

Anyway, from the place where we spoke with the girl to the hotel we took the classic tuk tuk, paying also the girl’s ride. When we reached the hotel, our hearts were beating out of our chests, the way they did in school when we cribbed our exams and we could have been caught anytime. My boyfriend went to the reception desk and held out the money crumpled in his fist, mumbling on an artificially neutral voice tone “Here, we have a guest, for our guest”.

The receptionist girl took the money unaffectedly and started with the prostitute a jovial conversation about the atmosphere in the city centre and what was happening there, as a matter of fact it was Thailand’s National Day and some events were being organized in the town. They spoke very normally and naturally, warmly, intimately, without judging in any way the girl or us, exactly as the Bible says, that very Bible that none of the Buddhist employees of the hotel ever read.

Sex with prostitutes

Going to prostitutes is like roulette. You may hit the jackpot or, in plain English, you may get fucked up (again, figuratively, cause literally you are getting fucked). The experience also taught me that, in Romania, the approximate ratio of fine prostitutes to crappy ones is one to five. And when I say crappy I’m not alluding to any intellectual initiatives, but to women who heavily question nature’s capacity to create a species superior to all other species. Which is frustrating, because after two or three crappy ones you kind give a shit on threesome sex, take your toys and go home.

No matter how desirous you may be one evening to have threesome sex, you’re put off immediately after the scheduling, or when you’re being told on the phone “we can have threesome sex, but I don’t touch the girl” or “we’ll do it, but be aware if you know there’s two of you, because it will cost you at least twice as much”. If you accidentally find a fine prostitute that offers you a noteworthy moment, my advice is to take pleasure in her presence, be grateful to her and light a candle for her every time when you go to church, because eventually she will inevitably disappear. It seems that all fine babes leave the country or simply vanish into thin air.

After all what’s been said, is it worth to make so many efforts in order to have sex with more people? Yes, it’s utterly worthwhile. Compare being well fucked to being well fucked while you’re kissing a wonderful babe, explore with your hand her intimate parts as she is kissing you back lost in your arms and, with a hand leaned on your partner’s hip, establishes his penetration rhythm as he enters in you…

So, what do you think? Under these circumstances, what does it mean, the sex in two? Maybe it’s just the compromise you make when you haven’t found the third person. Like when you’re hungry and you eat bread alone because you don’t have in your fridge either ham or cheese, or foie gras, or at least the traditional Bologna sausage.


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